


Hey there, welcome to Hot Topic!

by catboxjellyfish



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: ChanSoo - Freeform, Chansooweek, Chinguline, Crack, M/M, Strong Language Warning, and their friends are noisy af, hot topic AU, it's just a lot of swearing tbh, lol, poor junmyeon, privacy lol what privacy, seriously poor junmyeon, when a goth dates a pastel softy, why is it so hard being the normal one
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-08
Updated: 2019-06-08
Packaged: 2020-04-12 14:39:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,467
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19134103
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catboxjellyfish/pseuds/catboxjellyfish
Summary: Where can you find the most interesting mix of people? If you've guessed (fill in your answer here), you're wrong. The most interesting mix of people are working for Kim Junmyeon in the Hot Topic store he manages. This is a collection of stories about humanities, friendship, endurance, personal growth, overcoming and failing to resist the devil's temptations, hot weird people working together, poor Junmyeon making bad decisions, monkeys with coconut brains, and love. Intrigued? Good. Welcome to Hot Topic, how can we help you?





	Hey there, welcome to Hot Topic!

**Author's Note:**

> The summary is BS. This is just pure crack.

“So, who did this?” 

Junmyeon sighs deeply and eyes the nervous young man before him with mild disdain. Of course, it’s these four again. He really shouldn’t be surprised at their troublemaking antics anymore yet every time, he is rendered speechless and feeling slightly murderous when he discovers or stumbles upon a scene of the crime in his shop. Somehow, much to his frustration, the four troublemakers always manage to exceed his expectation for how much chaos and destruction they can cause when left on their own. Case and point, this backroom right now. Nothing has been spared. Almost everything is on the floor and only a lone sailor moon t-shirt is hanging limply on the ceiling fan, spinning slowly above them all. 

Work at a Hot Topic shop it’ll be fun, they said. Being the manager of a mall shop isn’t that hard, they said. Junmyeon mentally rolls his eyes for the millionth time and curses: Bullshit! He should have never listened to those people and took over this shop. He should have just taken his parents’ offer of buying him a supermarket and run that instead! But no, he has taken the wrong advice, chosen the wrong path, and now he works with hyperactive and horny art school monkeys. Not literally, but close enough. 

“Well, is someone going to answer me or will I have to pull it out of one of you, physically?”

Junmyeon asks again and his eyes narrow as he watches the boys try to communicate telepathically among themselves but obviously failing. His right eye twitches uncontrollably and he wonders yet again why the hell did he hire these coconut brains. 

At first, there’s Baekhyun, the compulsive gamer, the OG employee, and supposedly a fashion major. Junmyeon still thinks that’s a joke since he has learned over time that lots of things in this world are a joke to Baekhyun, including his own dignity. But if that’s not a joke, he doesn't’ understand why the fuck would a fashion major want to work at a Hot Topic Shop. Is being a dweeb and a geek the new trend in fashion? Because he’s pretty sure that’s all there is to Baekhyun: a geeky dweeb or a dweeby geek, depending on the day of the week and the weather. If Junmyeon had a choice, he wouldn’t have hired Baekhyun mostly because the gamer is just too damn loud. But he had no choice and Baekhyun seemed like a harmless inheritance that came with the shop so Junmyeon kept him around. 

Next, there is Chanyeol, the walking disaster, the otaku who clearly breathes Tumblr, and apparently a music major at Baekhyun’s university. Junmyeon supposes he had a good reason to hire Chanyeol since the boy has the visual to draw in customers. His happy-go-lucky attitude, pink hair and bright smile combined with his deep voice and lanky built made him the perfect honey trap for a specific type of customers, mostly the giggly teenage girls and the loud flaming gays. But sometimes Junmyeon wonders if it’s all with it, especially when it’s late at night and Junmyeon remembers all the things Chanyeol had accidentally broken at the store. Suddenly, it’s goodbye sleep and hello accounting books! By the time the sun is up and shining, the sleep-deprived manager often finds himself sending a cruel text to his tallest employee: _“You may not get paid this paycheck. Haha jk, you’re definitely not getting paid.”_

Then there is Kyungsoo, the boy who almost never talks, the closet goth, and The Punisher. Junmyeon at first genuinely liked Kyungsoo and that’s why he hired him. A polite and quiet young man, nothing like the two screaming mess already at the shop, and although his full black attire was a little plain, Junmyeon had rather preferred it. ‘I love plain’, Junmyeon thought and smiled a little too happy as he offered Kyungsoo the job, and truly, de separately needed some fucking plainness in his life. However, the universe hates him, or so Junmyeon sincerely believes, and just after two months of working at the shop, Baekhyun exposes Kyungsoo’s true identity. Turns out, the quiet young man is a famous hipster goth boy from the other university in town and he really didn’t want his work people to know. Oh, and he is also a black belt. Until this day, Junmyeon still winces when he recalls Kyungsoo transforming into The Punisher right before Baekhyun. Jongdae really was very accurate with the terming. 

Speaking of Jongdae, he’s the last of the four troublemakers and the last to join the team. He is the only one Jummyeon thinks that actually has any brains at all. He is also, by comparison to the other three, the only normal one. He dresses normal, talks normal, has no unhealthy obsessions, no hidden life, and is just a typical music student looking to make some money to cover his broke ass. In fact, he is so normal, Junmyeon almost didn’t hire him at first because the skeptical manager was sure that Jongdae’s apparent normalcy was just a guise and a trick from the universe leading him towards an even crazier and unmanageable life. After all, why would a normal person want to work at a Hot Topic shop, especially one that will subject him to become coworkers with Baekhyun, Chanyeol and Kyungsoo? Then Junmyeon found out that Jongdae applied because he is actually classmates with Chanyeol. ‘Oh hell nah’, Junmyeon thought venomously and pounded back three shots of soju in a row. He was convinced that Jongdae applying to work at his store was the devil’s work and he was no fool to falling for that trap! If it wasn’t batshit insane, Junmyeon would have definitely hired a private investigator to dig up Jongdae’s entire life. But fortunately, he still had some sanity and common sense left in him, and after a few sleepless nights of intense internal debates, Jongdae was hired. 

In all honesty, it is quite impressive that Junmyeon hasn’t started prematurely balding ever since he took over the Hot Topic shop, and you can be sure that no one is more impressed with that fact than the man himself. However, as he looks around the backroom again, which looks as if a tornado had gone through it, Junmyeon seriously considers checking out hair growth shampoos on Amazon. If no one answers him in the next five seconds, he will go bald from pulling out his own hair. 

A weird noise, much like that of a cat choking on a hairball, rumbles from Junmyeon’s throat and visibly, it sends the four already nervous employees into a new level of uneasiness. After another four and a half seconds of wordless panicking involving frantic finger pointing and jabs, Jongdae finally takes one for the team. 

“Technically,” the normal one starts off slowly and stresses his deliberate use of word again, “technically, it was me…” 

The disturbing noise suddenly cuts short and the entire backroom falls into a deathly silence. Junmyeon narrows his eyes further until they practically become slits and he inadvertently lets out a menacing growl. He should have known, it’s always the normal one. His suspicions were right all along and now he’s got proof! 

“But truthfully, it’s actually Baekhyun,” Jongdae adds very quickly and takes a cautious step away from the growling manager, “If he hasn’t said what he said to me then I wouldn’t have rushed in and all of this wouldn’t have happened.”

“WHAT??” Baekhyun screeches way too loudly and his piercing voice forces Junmyeon to shut his eyes and mourn for his hearing. “HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME, KIM JONGDAE! AND I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL GOING ON HERE!”

“Baekhyun, please! We’ve talked about this before, use your goddamn inside voice!” Junmyeon winces and shouts, hoping to overpower in volume and authority but the offended gamer ignores him completely. 

“IF YOU’RE GOING TO BE SUCH A FUCKING TATTLE I’M NEVER TELLING YOU ANYTHING INTERESTED EVER AGAIN!”

“AH WAE??” Jongdae wails and unlike Junmyeon, who is now pretty sure he will not only be bald soon but also deaf, he is a certified music major and sure knows how to project his voice. “I ran into the back room because you said Chanyeol and Kyungsoo are having sex in the backroom and I had to stop them because that’s disgusting and unhygienic and just gross!” 

“Wait, WHAT?” 

“We’re not that horny!” 

“Byun Baekhyun, you’re dead.”

Three voices erupted at the same time, first of a freaked-out Junmyeon, second of an insulted Chanyeol, and lastly of Kyungsoo who sounds calm but is ready for blood. 

“OH, MY, GOD, I DIDN’T SAY THAT,” Baekhyun screams, raising his voice even louder than before, “I SAID THEY ARE AT THE BACK ALONE AND THEY ARE PROBABLY MAKING OUT! HOW DOES THAT TRANSLATE INTO HAVING SEX?? AND YES, CHANYEOL YOU ARE THAT HORNY!” 

Chanyeol gasps dramatically, looking hurt, but his ears betray him as they gradually turn into a shade of beet red. 

Junmyeon slowly turns to look at Kyungsoo and Chanyeol and on his face is an expression that a three-year-old would make if he was just told that mom and dad are getting a divorce: a little forlorn, somewhat upset, and a whole lot of confusion. “Are you two dating?” he asks, sounding much more tentative and curious than he had thought he’d sound. Before he could get an answer, Jongdae bats the blame ball back to Baekhyun.

“Because while you were saying that, you also made those ridiculous wink faces that you do whenever you talk about watching a movie when you actually mean you’re going to watch porn!” Jongdae answers furiously and throws his arms into the air, “not to mention, you kept thrusting and jerking your hips around weirdly like you were air banging the cash registered SO, OF COURSE, I WOULD GET THE WRONG IDEA!” 

“WOOOOW, HOW DARE YOU EXPOSE ME OF MY PORN HINTING WINKS!” 

“That’s your porn hinting wink??”Chanyeol intercepts, looking quite horrified, “you made that face at me the other day!” 

“You did what?” Kyungsoo snaps and immediately glares at Baekhyun, who frantically waves his arms randomly in some useless act of self-defense. 

“NO. NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO,” the gamer shakes his head and takes a step back, “It’s not what you think, Kyungsoo! It’s because he was saying that you guys still haven’t made it all the way and you know how insecure he can get so I was encouraging him on! I was only winking at him to says ‘Hop on that horse!’, ‘Ride that stallion!’, and uh ‘Fulfill your Brokeback Mountain love except with no female leads and a much happier ending where nobody dies’... you know?” 

Junmyeon turns to look at Baekhyun instead, still looking like a three-year-old living through his parents’ divorce. 

Kyungsoo too stares at the babbling gamer and a frown settles in between his prominent brows. Slowly and stiffly, he faces his boyfriend and asks in a low, monotone voice: “You told Baekhyun about that?” 

Chanyeol looks Kyungsoo in the eyes and subconsciously mimics his boyfriend’s expression and answers calmly and in a matter of fact: “Um yeah because he’s my best friend..?” 

“Oh...” 

“Is... that not okay?”

“No, it’s not okay!” Junmyeon explodes suddenly, catching everyone’s attention, “It’s never okay to fuck in someone’s back room! 

“BUT THEY DIDN’T FUCK!” Baekhyun goes off again and points his finger at Jongdae, “It’s all your fault for having a dirty mind!” 

“ME??” Jongdae wails and slaps Baekhyun’s finger “How would I have gotten the wrong idea if you haven’t made such misleading insinuations?” 

“We did fuck!” Chanyeol joins the screaming match, towering over his two best friends, “just not in the backroom!” 

Kyungsoo slaps his boyfriend across the head and hisses: “Why are you telling people that we fucked?” 

“Oh for fuck’s sake, live a little, Kyungsoo!” Baekhyun redirects his aggression toward the goth boy glaring at him, “for someone who dresses as kinky as you, you sure are a prude.” 

“Hey!” Chanyeol chimes in defensively, “he’s not a prude! I know that personally!” 

“TMI!” Jongdae shouts and blocks his ears, “I don’t want to hear this about Kyungsoo!” 

“Stop saying stupid shit, Chanyeol!” 

“Stop being a bad goth, Kyungsoo!” 

“Being a goth has nothing to do with having kinky sex, Baekhyun! And no, I don’t need to prove that to you, Kyungsoo said so!” 

“Lalalalala, I can’t hear you! Are you guys _still_ talking about Kyungsoo being kinky??” 

Slowly, Junmyeon blinks at the chaotic scene before him and he takes a huge breath in. Actually, he didn’t blink slowly. Nobody does that, it’d look way too stupid, and people only do it in TV dramas for theatric effects. But even though he didn’t actually blink slowly, Junmyeon sure felt like he did because everything around him right now seems to have slowed down. He hates it. He has always had this happen, ever since as a kid, that whenever he is about to lose his shit, time seems to slow down. It is as if the universe is giving him a little extra time to prepare his wrath delivery. After all, he doesn’t get this angry often, it’s too exhausting. So when he does, he supposes he should deliver and commit fully, and he did just that. 

“SHUT UP, ALL OF YOU!” Junmyeon bellows and slams his fist against the wall, hard. Immediately, he regrets doing that because a) if he broke the wall, it’d be another pain in the ass problem to fix; and b) that really hurt. Thankfully his overdramatic display of anger has paid off and the back room has returned to a state of silence. Regaining his composure, Junmyeon takes in another deep breath before speaking up again as long as he can without feeling lightheaded, especially after that howl he just pulled. 

“Look, I can’t believe I’m saying this but I’m happy to hear that nobody has had sex in my backroom because if any of you did, I will make you burn everything you have touched, pay me for the damage, and then I will personally make your life living hell, capiche?!” He glares around and gets four obedient nods in return. 

“Good. Now, I want to know exactly what happened here. By that I mean how,” Junmyeon points to all the merchandise on the floor and that one t-shirt still spinning with the ceiling fan, “did all of these end up on the floor instead of on the storage shelves?! And who,” he looks at each of his employees in the eyes and speaks nice and slow as if talking to toddlers, “did what, resulting in this mess.” 

The four troublemakers look at each other, at Junmyeon then at each other again. Chanyeol fidgets with the dangling zipper tag on Kyungsoo’s sleeve and Baekhyun’s eyes dart back and forth between the other three. Kyungsoo gently kicks Jongdae’s shoe and the latter rolls his eyes before answering their manager. 

“Well, like I said, it was technically my fault. I rushed in here because of what Baekhyun said,” Jongdae shoots a look at the man in mention, “and when I opened the door, it hit the latter someone had stupidly placed here. And then,” 

“And then,” Baekhyun picks up Jongdae’s narrative with a small apologetic smile, “I might have been running too closely behind Jongdae and pushed him a little when he opened the door. The door hit the ladder, the ladder hit the shelves, and next thing you know, dominion effect and gravity takes over and everything ends up on the floor. We had just straightened the shelves when you walked in on us...” 

Junmyeon raises a skeptical and unimpressed brow, “but why the hell was the ladder by the door in the first place?” 

Chanyeol’s face flashes red in an instant and he huddles closer to Kyungsoo, who is also looking as pink as his boyfriend’s hair and staring at the tip of his combat boots. 

“Goddamn it,” Junmyeon snaps in annoyance. He picks up a shirt from the ground and throws it angrily at the couple, “you said you did nothing in here!” 

“I said we didn’t fuck in here!” Chanyeol retorts and dodges the shirt, “I just didn’t want anyone to walk in while I’m spending time with Kyungsoo.” He mumbles then turns to Jongdae with a pout. “Who’d thought he’d push the door so hard.” 

“It’s not me, it’s Baekhyun,” Jongdae whines and shoves the gamer forward a little, “you heard him, he pushed me!” 

“Ya ya ya!” Baekhyun stumbles forward, flustered, but quickly recovers and points towards Chanyeol., “He’s not even supposed to work today! All of this shit happened because he showed up!” 

Kyungsoo sends a cutthroat look at Baekhyun before turning to speak to Junmyeon: “Look, it’s pretty clear that all of us are at partial fault for this mess so how about we stop fighting and just clean up. We are all very sorry.” He bows deeply and one by one, the other three follows suit, all of them shouting ‘I AM VERY SORRY’ at the top of their lungs. 

Junmyeon lets out a quivering breath and if he’s capable of breathing fire, a flame would have shot out of his mouth already. He is mad, no doubt, but he agrees with Kyungsoo. He cannot believe he agrees with Kyungsoo but he is a rational man, a very mad man, but nevertheless, a rational man. 

“Fine, clean this up,” Junmyeon points repeatedly at the piles of mess everywhere, and also at the single t-shirt on the fan, “and that! How the hel- you know what, I don’t want to know, just clean it all up!” He stomps out and seconds later stomps right back in. 

“And none of you will get paid for time spent on cleaning this up!” he adds in a huff and stomps to show how serious he is. He shuts down any oncoming objections with a flurry of hand gestures and random noises before dragging Chanyeol out of the back room with him and shuts the door. In an instance, blessed silence, and Junmyeon sighs. It’s only 2pm and he’s already done. 

“What time does the store close today?” He asks sluggishly and walks towards the front of the store, which he just realizes that it hasn’t been manned for the twenty minutes. 

“Um, 9pm.” Chanyeol answers carefully. 

“Fuck…” Junmyeon mumbles and slaps a hand on his forehead. “And this is what happens when you spend too much time with monkeys with coconuts for brains”, he grumbles under his breath and kicks at nothing but air, “you become a monkey as well, a balding one at that too…” 

“Sorry hyung, did you say something?” the pink haired boy asks meekly when they get back to the storefront. Spinning on his heels and putting on his best customer service smile, Junmyeon stands on his tippy-toes and slaps his giant employee on the shoulder. 

“Chanyeol-ah, you’re working until close but don’t worry, I’ll pay you.” 

“Really?” 

“Nope,” Junmyeon smiles wider and relishes in the crushing look in Chanyeol’s puppy eyes, “I lied. You’re working until closed and definitely not getting paid.” 

Walking away to the sound of Chanyeol’s groan of sadness, Junmyeon cackles in satisfaction and the anger burning inside of his diminishes a little. With slightly lighter steps, he strolls over to the front of the shop and checks on the merchandise. Two pairs of matching runners come into his view as he rearranges some bottom shelf projects and he reactively straights up to greet the potential customers. 

“Hey guys, welcome to Hot Topic!” 

Two handsome boys blink back at him. The slightly shorter one with nice tan bows slightly with a small smile while the other boy with a poker face asks: “Are you hiring?”

The smile on Junmyeon’s face freezes and he discreetly scans the two boys up and down. They look like high schoolers. Their clothing looks pretty typical for teenage boys their age and neither of them are wearing any weird pieces of jewelry. Although he can’t tell how their personalities will be but Junmyeon is tempted to answer yes because of their handsome good looks. They could be additional Chanyeols, mouldable honey traps for bringing in customers! A glint of greed flashes in Junmyeon’s eyes and he loses yet another round to the devil’s handiwork. This will be fine, he convinces himself and makes a mental reminder for himself to check out hair growth shampoo on Amazon tonight. Folding his hands behind his back and standing tall, subconsciously trying to rival the two boys’ imposing heights, Junmyeon smiles brightly and answers in a cheerful voice. 

“Yep, you bet!” 

 

\---

**FIN?**

**Or**

**TBC??**

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Wow, it's been a while since I've posted anything. This is for D2 of chansooweek (https://twitter.com/chansooweek) the original AU is from @yeolcifer (https://twitter.com/yeolcifers). This is actually a follow up to one of the comics she drew for the AU and I just couldn't resist haha. First time writing from Junmyeon's perspective and I've not idea if I got it or not so uh, live with it. I've also not yet properly edited this because I'm in a rush to post it LOL so once I have properly edited it, I will remove this sentence. 
> 
> I know I said I'd write more but tbh, I just haven't been able to. Between work, trying to date, family and my ailing health (lol but not really OvO), writing for chansoo has fallen to the bottom of the priority list, unfortunately. However, I do want to write more for this AU! It was so much fun writing this even though I definitely killed myself writing 3.5k in just under 5 hours... 
> 
> Anyways, as always, I welcome comments and I will try to reply as soon as I can! I haven't been around here much but I'll make an effort to come back! Also you can find me on twitter at @catboxjellyfish. Thanks for reading, guys! I hope you liked it <3


End file.
